Monday, April 14, 2014

Finding a moment to post

I'm back, not sure for how long, but here I am. I felt like I was neglecting my blog. Sometimes I get so busy I forget about it. I love it when Pete posts and I can see it all from his perspective.


Right now I am looking over some material for class tonight and it hits very close to home. I have been struggling with long buried feelings surrounding Pete's illness. Hopefully I can get through tonight without too much drama.


It is surreal to me that a journey that began two years ago will finish at the end of the summer. It leaves me frightened about the fact I have to move on with what I have been training for. I have so many questions and not many answers at the moment. My friend last night reminded me that I am in the Lord's hands. I have to hold onto that and it was a good reminder.


I love what I am doing, I never knew I could feel such satisfaction and terror all at the same time.


I can't wait to feel what it is to actually have a weekend again. They have been few and far between. My kids might not know what to do with having a mommy again.


I still have it - as evidenced by a scholarship I have been awarded - for the semester AFTER I graduate. This might sound overly confident, but I need it to get through what I am doing (the confidence).


Graduation is on May 7th - Pete protests because it is his birthday but I know he is all bluster on that one. Unfortunately after that I have one more semester to go and two really big tests.