Flynn Family

I feel so displaced. We gave up our apartment, some of our stuff, other stuff went into storage. I am so lost right now. I am waiting in limbo for the answers we need. I wish that this would go faster, Monday needs to get here. I hope we can wait that long. Poor Pete is just having some bad days. I need this out of his brain. I want him back. Also hanging in the balance is where I am sending Jackson to first grade. It is so hard to know what to do. I don't know how we will find someplace to live. I am holding onto the faith that this will turn out the way it is supposed to turn out. I am running out of strength. Luckily this time I am surrounded by family. It helps. I still want to run away, but I don't know where I would go. I need to keep myself occupied. Find a job would be a good place to start, but even so I don't know what kind of treatment they want to do.

We made it down to Ririe . It was a long and basically uneventful trip. Wyatt decided to liven things up on both sides of Lolo Pass by getting carsick... I was driving once and Pete drove the other time. Just a winding road and he was sitting in the sun. I thought I was prepared, but we still had to change his clothes once... The second time I had a barf bag out quicker... We are here and have doctor appointments next Monday and Tuesday. Happy anniversary to us. I just hope they can get this figured out and we are on a where do we go from here path.

Tonight will be our last night in Lewiston for a long time.. I know we will be back for visits since Pete's mom and grandma are here and his dad is in Craigmont. The car is packed and all we have to do is a little cleaning tonight before we hit the road in the morning. Everything has pointed to this being what we need to do, but that doesn't stop the mixed feelings surrounding this. I pray that the doctors are able to get us through this and get Pete well again. I pray that I will be able to find a job and get an income going for our little family. I thank Him for our friends and family who have been so good and supportive through this whole ordeal. I hope this is the beginning of the end of this illness and bad spell. Thank you all for everything and I will see you on the flip side.

Wow so many changes suddenly happening...We are packing up the apartment so we don't have the bills to worry about in case of an extended utah stay... I am guessing we have to be in the general area for treatments and follow up for the next 18 months... We will put things in storage in Pete's grandma's garage until we find someplace to settle. Pete told me the other day that he feels that is where we need to me. It is so refreshing to hear him put it that way and that it is his idea... He has appointments on the 3rd and 4th of August. The 4th stinks because it is our anniversery, maybe i could convince one of my sisters to let us go out, hint hint.. Lainey will be staying up here under the care of one of her friend's family. I don't know where Jackson will continue his schooling, I think I will have him start first grade in Ririe if we haven't settled before then. Hopefully I can find some job opportunity. We will be leaving Lewiston behind next Friday, my mothe...

I would love to give you a positive update, I really would. Pete had an MRI this morning and he has five cryptococcal cysts on his brain. What am I supposed to do with this? They are changing his medications. We are looking at longer hospital stay and possibly brain surgery to drain the cysts... I can't take much more and I really, really don't want to lose him.